A Hardened Heart

Yesterday, I had the privilege of allowing an up-and-coming leader to teach from my pulpit. Raising up leaders, equipping them, and giving them space to explore their gifts and talents is one of my favorite parts of being a Lead Pastor.  This gentlemen shared at length the things that G-d had laid on his heart. One thing in particular has sat with me through the night and into this morning causing my heart to stir and words to come forth.  He spoke of the hardening of our hearts.  "Our hardened heart is our responsibility. No one else can fix it, in fact we can't fix it. Only Jesus can."  He proposed that seeking the Kingdom of God and Jesus is the only thing that will fix a hardened heart.  He's right. Embracing repentance and seeking reconciliation are Kingdom requirements. Jesus brings his Kingdom and it is revealed in those very things. Joining Jesus in that work is the only thing that will breathe life back into a dead, hardened heart because these things are the very essence of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. 

So how do you know if you have a hardened heart? 

It's in the clinching of your fists, 

the scowling of your face, 

the whispers of death in your breath. 

It's in the words that you speak 

and the words that you can't 

because deep down 

you know

they are wrong. 

A hardened heart closes your mind 

and shrinks your world

building walls of division.

It suffocates the Spirit's work in your life 

and feels like a ton of bricks 

sitting in your chest. 

It shows itself in the piercing glances 

producing a fear-driven reality. 

A hardened heart speaks lies to you 

when you look in the mirror 

or even just when you slow down to think. 

A hardened heart refuses to be wrong

refuses to forgive

refuses to let go.

A hardened heart cannot see truth.  

So what do you do if you're brave enough to see your hardened heart? 

If your heart is hardened, you have only two options: 

1) Jesus' way which is found all over the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7) - to humble yourself, die to the hardened heart's desire for death, repent and reconcile. 

...or...

2) continue to live in the bondage of that hardened heart until it squeezes all semblance of life from your bones and you're left bitter, frozen, cold with no vision and with no hope. Pharoah's hardened heart led him straight to his death. 

But it's your responsibility to make that choice. You can't blame someone else for your hardened heart and the consequences of it. 

While your hardened heart will keep you from perceiving spiritual truth, you must allow yourself to see physical truth of your reality and you have speak it.  Is the hardness towards a person? towards a place? towards an event? towards something else? How deep does this run? How thick have the hard walls of your heart been bullt? Are they continuing to thicken? 

Be attentive to any cracks, any places that light has burst through the stone because those places are the Kingdom calling out to your heart. This is hope! Run towards those places and seek repentance and reconciliation trusting the promise of Jesus.  

But perhaps you can't see any light? Perhaps you feel mostly dead and frozen on the inside? Perhaps being near that person, or place or thing, only serves to harden your heart more. If that's the case, then removing yourself from the situation is the most loving thing you can do for others, but I do not think it's the most loving thing you can do for yourself. Choosing the Kingdom and death to that hardened heart is the most loving thing for yourself. Jesus warns against a hardened heart and calls us to repentance. He calls us to be a reconciled people. Jesus promises new life, a new heart, a new breath, but we have to be willing participants!